How to forgive
Yulia was sitting on the windowsill and looking out the window. The children were playing outside, but she didn't want to go out. She didn't want to see anyone. Especially Darina.
Just yesterday they were best friends. And today — Yulia knew: Daria told Olena her secret. The same one she had confided only to her. That she was afraid of the dark.
Now the whole class knew. And someone laughed.
Yulia squeezed the pillow. Something inside was burning—hot and prickly, like a splinter in her heart.
"I won't be friends with her," she whispered. "Never again.".
"That 'never' seems a bit heavy," a quiet voice said.
Julia shuddered and turned around. On the bookshelf, between the album with drawings and the fairy tale about the Forest Witch, sat a small owl in round glasses. And next to it was a red squirrel in a pink scarf, clutching an acorn and looking at Julia with warmth and a little anxiety.
"I'm Sophie," the owl said calmly.
"And I'm Solomiyka!" the squirrel picked up. "And you, Yulia, look as if you're carrying something very heavy.".
"My friend told me my secret," Yulia snapped. "I trusted her.".
"It hurts," nodded Owl Sophie. "It really hurts.".
“Maybe she didn’t want to do it on purpose?” Solomiyka asked quietly.
“It doesn’t matter!” Yulia turned to the window. “She told me anyway.”.
"I hear you," Sofiyka said softly. "You have the right to be offended. But you know... there's a difference between feeling pain and carrying it in your heart for years.".
Yulia was silent. Then she asked — quietly, almost to herself:
"So, just accept it and forgive it? As if nothing happened?"
— Not «as if nothing happened,» replied the Owl. — But «I decide to let go of this bitterness.» That’s completely different.
Solomiyka jumped from the shelf to the windowsill and sat down next to Yulia.
“Maybe we can see together how it really works?” she suggested, leaning her warm ear against Yulia’s shoulder.
Julia sighed. And nodded.
🦉 Lesson from Sofiyka
1. Resentment is a heavy stone that you carry yourself.
When we are hurt, it seems that the offense punishes the one who did the wrong. But in reality, this heavy stone lies in your own heart - and pulls only you. The offender lives on, and you carry the burden. Therefore, letting go of the offense is, first of all, a gift to yourself, not to another.
2. Forgiving doesn't mean saying "everything is okay"«
It is very important to understand: to forgive is not to say, «What happened is good» or «I didn’t feel any pain at all.» It is to let go of the bitterness. You can say, «I was very hurt. I don’t want to carry this pain anymore.» That is what true forgiveness is.
"I once took offense at a branch that broke under me," Solomiyka admits and blinks happily. "I was angry with it for a long time. And then I realized: the branch doesn't care, but I don't." I let go - and it immediately felt better!"
3. Revenge only fuels the fire
Sometimes you want to take revenge - to tell someone's secret in return, to say something offensive. But revenge is like throwing firewood into a fire: the flame becomes bigger and burns everyone around. After revenge, it doesn't get any easier - it gets even worse. For both of you.
4. Try to understand why it happened this way
Maybe your friend did it unintentionally—she blurted it out without thinking. Maybe she herself was feeling bad at the time and didn't follow through on her words. This doesn't excuse the act, but it helps to understand: most people don't mean to hurt on purpose. Understanding softens the heart—even when it hurts.
"I once almost ate an acorn belonging to my friend Whitetail," Solomiyka says quietly. "I thought it was nobody's. He was offended. And when I explained, he understood. Unintentional is different.".
5. Tell me honestly what hurt you.
Forgiveness doesn't mean keeping quiet about your own. You can calmly, without shouting, say: "When you told me my secret, it hurt me a lot. I hoped you would keep it." This is not a fight. This is honesty. And it helps the person around you understand where they went wrong.
6. When you forgive, it becomes easier for you.
Forgiveness is not for the other person. It is for you. When you let go of a grudge, it is like taking a heavy backpack off your shoulders. That prickly weight in your chest disappears. It becomes easier to breathe. And you want to go outside again, laugh, and be friends.
7. You can forgive — and still respect your boundaries
Forgiving doesn't mean immediately trusting the same secret again. You can forgive a person and at the same time decide: I won't reveal this part of myself for now. This is not cruelty. This is self-care. Forgiveness and your own boundaries coexist beautifully.
Yulia sat on the windowsill for a long time. Then she took out her phone and texted Daryna: "It really hurt me what you told me. I want you to know.".
As she sent the message, something inside her loosened up a little. Not completely—but it wasn't as bad anymore.
An hour later, Daria wrote back: "Yulia, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean it. Please forgive me.".
Yulia looked at these words. She thought. Then she wrote: "Okay. Let's talk.".
The stone in my chest didn't disappear right away, but it became a little smaller. And then it got even smaller. And finally it fell off.
The children were still playing outside. Yulia hung up the phone, got up from the windowsill, and started putting on her shoes.
Sofiyka believes in you. And Solomiyka too. 🦉🐿️