How not to brag
Artem bought a bicycle on Saturday morning. Shiny, blue, with a bell and a basket on the front. The boy couldn't wait to ride it out into the yard.
The friends were already playing there — Darynka with a hoop, Maksyk with a skipping rope, and Petrik was just sitting on a bench and chewing an apple.
"Look!" Artemko exclaimed, rolling his bicycle through the gate. "They bought me the best bicycle in the whole city! It's the fastest and the most beautiful!"
Petrik raised his head. He looked at the bicycle. Then he started chewing the apple again.
"Class," he muttered quietly.
— This is not just a "class," — Artemko circled around his friends and rang the bell. — No one has this! Not you, Petryk, not you, Maksyk. Only me!
Maksyk lowered the rope. Darinka stopped the hoop.
"That's good," said Darinka and went to the sandbox.
"I'm home," said Maxik and picked up the skipping rope from the ground.
Petrik ate the last piece of apple, got up and silently followed them.
Artemko was left alone in the middle of the yard with his shiny blue bicycle. The bell rang again - and everything fell silent.
The boy didn't understand at first what had happened. He had shown such a beautiful thing! Shouldn't his friends have been happy with him?
"Something went wrong," a soft voice came from above.
Artemko raised his head. On the fence between two boards sat a small owl in round glasses, and next to it was a red squirrel in a pink scarf, clutching an acorn in its paws and shaking its head.
— I am Owl Sophie.
"And I'm Squirrel Straw!" the squirrel picked up. "And I saw your friends leave. All three of them!"
"But I just showed the bike," Artemko spread his hands.
"He showed me, yes," said Sofiyka. "But he also said that no one else has it. And that's something completely different.".
Artemko looked at the bicycle. Then at the empty yard. Then again at the owl.
"Tell me," he asked quietly.
"With pleasure," replied Owl Sophie. "Sit on the bench. The bicycle won't go anywhere.".
🦉 Lesson from Sofiyka
1. It's great to be happy about your success. But showing off is off-putting.
When you are given something or you succeed in something, it is truly a reason for joy! Be happy, jump, shout «hurray!» But there is a fine line: rejoicing in your own success is warm. And shouting about it in such a way that others feel worse is already painful. Friends don’t leave because they are jealous. They leave because they are uncomfortable around them.
2. «Sharing joy» and «rising» are different things.
Imagine: you say «look, what a bike, I’m so happy!» and everyone can rejoice with you. And if you say «no one has one like this, only I have one» – you are no longer sharing, you are comparing. And this comparison tells others: «you are worse.» Even if you didn’t mean it.
"That's why I don't want to be around him right away," Solomiyka admitted honestly and pressed the acorn to her chest. "Not because I'm jealous. It just... hurts a little.".
3. Imagine how someone who doesn't have this feels.
Petrik listened to you and what was he thinking? Maybe he doesn't have a bicycle at all. Maybe he would really like to, but he can't. And then you go and say to his face: "you don't have one, but I do." It's like bragging about a delicious dinner to someone who is hungry. Try to put yourself in someone else's shoes — and it immediately becomes clear which words are worth saying and which are not.
4. Real things speak for themselves.
If the bike is really cool, your friends will see it. If you can really draw well, everyone will notice. You don't have to shout about it. Quiet things often speak louder than words. And when a person keeps reminding you how great they are, it usually means they don't really believe it themselves.
5. Notice and praise others — rejoice in their successes too.
Maksik has a jump rope — and he jumps very deftly. Darinka has a hoop — and she spins it so that you just marvel. If you notice it out loud, they will be pleased. And the one who notices the good in others attracts friends to him like a magnet. Because you want to be near such a person.
"You know," squeaked Solomiyka, "when someone says to me, 'Oh, how clever you are, how you know how to collect acorns!' I just blossom all over! I want to be friends with such a person forever!"
6. Modesty is not belittling yourself.
Some kids think that modesty is saying «it’s nothing special,» even when it turned out well. But that’s not true. Modesty is not putting yourself above others. You can be happy with your bike to the fullest and not tell your friend that his is worse. You can be yourself and not trample anyone around you.
7. Share without comparison.
There is a magical difference between the two phrases. "I did it! I'm so happy!" is an invitation to rejoice together. "I have it better than you" is a blow. The first unites, the second divides. Try saying only the first part the next time you want to brag. You'll see - your friends will stick around.
Artemko sat and thought. The yard remained empty. The bench creaked under him.
“Can I fix it?” he asked finally.
"You can always do it," said Owl Sophie.
Artemko got up, leaned his bike against the fence, and walked to the entrance, where Petryk, Maksyk, and Darynka were sitting. They were eating seeds and were silent.
"Listen," said Artemko. "I said some stupid things. I'm sorry. Do you want to take turns riding?"
Petrik looked at him. Then at the bike. Then he smiled.
— I want to.
“Me too,” Darynka picked up.
“Me too!” shouted Maxik and ran to his bicycle.
They rode until dinner. And Artemko laughed the loudest of all — not because he had the best bike, but because his friends were nearby.
And there was no one on the fence between the two boards. Only a small acorn lay where Solomiyka had been sitting.
She probably left it on purpose.
Sofiyka believes in you. And Solomiyka too. 🦉🐿️