How to listen to others
"That's an island," Olya explained, drawing with chalk on the asphalt. "Look: here's the sea, here's the sand, and here's the treasure. The rules are: whoever falls into the water—that's it."
"I know!" exclaimed Timko. "It's out of the game! I've played that before!"
"No, wait," said Olya. "It's different here. Whoever falls into the water —"
"He's becoming a shark!" Timko interrupted again. "That's even more interesting!"
Olya stopped. She looked at him. Then at the chalk in her hand. Then she just stood up silently and put the chalk in her pocket.
“The game is canceled,” she said quietly.
“Why?” Timko was surprised.
"Because you've already figured it all out for me," Olya replied and walked away.
Misha looked at Timko. "This isn't the first time," he said, and also went to the sandbox.
Timko was left alone. He sat on the bench and watched the children play without him. Something was wrong. But what exactly - he could not understand.
Something moved in the crown of the nearby chestnut tree. A small owl with glasses and a squirrel with an acorn looked at him from above — calmly and attentively. So attentively that Timko involuntarily fell silent. And for the first time all day — he simply listened.
🦉 Lesson from Sofiyka
1. Listening is also an action
When someone is talking and you are silent and listening, you are not just waiting for your turn. You are doing something very important: you are making the person feel important. It is not boring. It is a gift.
2. An unfinished thought is like an unfinished song
Imagine: someone is singing a song, and you suddenly pick up and sing the end — in your own voice and with the wrong words. Is it offensive? Words feel that way too when they are cut off. Olya wanted to explain her game, her idea — but her thought remained unfinished.
"It's like biting someone else's cookies!" Solomiyka exclaimed. "You don't bite other people's cookies, do you? And other people's words are not necessary either!"
3. You can think and be silent at the same time
A thought that pops into your head won't go away unless you say it right away. It will wait. Try to hold it inside—at least for a little while—and listen to what the other person has to say until the end. Then it's your turn. We promise—it won't go away.
4. Maybe you didn't guess.
Timko thought he knew the game. But he didn't let Olya finish — what if there were other rules? Special, new ones? When we interrupt, we think we already know everything. But sometimes the most interesting thing is right at the end.
"I did the same thing once!" Solomiyka jumped out again. "I decided I knew where the nuts were," and ran. And there weren't any nuts anywhere near there. If only I had listened to the end..." she sighed and twirled the acorn.
5. Pausing is not a weakness
Sometimes you really want to talk. Especially when you know the answer, or have come up with something cool, or are just overwhelmed. But a pause — a short silence between someone else's words and your own — is not weakness. It's intelligence. That's what those who like to be listened to do.
6. Ask if you can't wait
If you really want to say something, you can quietly raise your hand or wait and then ask: "Can I add?" This little word "can" is like a door: it opens the conversation, not bursts into it.
7. Friendship grows in the silence between words
True friends are not those who talk the most. They are those who know how to listen. When you listen to someone to the end, the person feels: «I am important. I am respected.» And then they want to listen to you too. That is how true friendship grows.
Timko sat silently for another minute. Then he got up and went to the sandbox. He found Olya.
"I'm sorry," he said. "I interrupted. Can you explain the rules again? I promise I'll listen to the end.".
Olya looked at him. She was silent for a moment. Then she took out her chalk.
"So," she began. "There is an island. Whoever falls into the water doesn't come out and doesn't become a shark. He becomes the sea. And he can stop others with one touch.".
Timko squeezed his hands together to keep the words inside. It was hard. But he managed.
Sofiyka believes in you. And Solomiyka too. 🦉🐿️